Charismatic?
I hate to admit it now, but I spent the best part of 10 years in Charismatic churches, all vaguely related, from 1977 to 1986. Just in case you've missed it, these are churches which major on "The Gifts of the Spirit", notably speaking in tongues, prophecy, healings and the like. People who have "received" such "gifts" generally look down their noses at people who haven't. Yet the funny thing is that people who sing repetitively "Where the spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty", seem to be the most keen to lock themselves up securely and throw away the key. Strange really. Apart, that is, from the guy at the top who knows what he's doing (and I don't mean God, I mean the chap with the flash car).
Introductions
My introduction to this whole subject was at University. A guy I'd known at school came to see me during my first term there. He was hotly into the Charismatic movement and before he left he gave me a book, saying that I must read it. Then another friend, hotly against all things Charismatic, came to visit, saw the book and ended up leaving me another book. Then the first guy rolled up again, left another book, then the second guy came round and so on and before I knew it I had two piles of books I didn't want to read! None of it really made any sense to me. Most of the people I knew at University were Christian Union members - a lot from Northern Ireland where opinions are pretty uncompromising. If you want to see what I mean have a look at http://www.ianpaisley.org this site from a well-known hate-monger.
Speaking in tongues
This is where much has been written, and it seems appropriate to give my experience rather than speculate. I really was quite reluctant to receive the "gift". However, one night, and after someone (who I now have quite a dim view of for other reasons) prayed for me, I had a weird dream about speaking in tongues and woke up to find I was. Odd as it may seem, I still can. However reading various people's testimonies this is fairly universal to people who have been in the Charismatic scene even if they believe none of it these days. It made little sense to me then and it doesn't now. If I do it right now I come up with phrases like: Isty kallama koo ballah kandasama Oo balla macanda I really don't know what it is all about. I have to admit that it is weird, and no unbiased person has ever convinced me that it is really a language despite all the urban myths about people being instantly awe-struck hearing genuine Mandarin Chinese or something. Listening to my own or to other peoples "tongues" they all seemed very repetitive combinations of syllables to me - and when "interpretations" were given they never seemed to be the repetitive phrases of the "tongue", or even of a similar length (they were usually much longer). We read all about it in 1 Corinthians 12 and 14 but at times it really isn't clear whether it is a good or bad thing - J.B. Phillips in his translation admits to having changed chapter 14 to make sense to him - or indeed whether it is the same thing as today's tongues. We are also told about "The mind being unfruitful" when someone is speaking in tongues and are informed this is a good thing. But why should God give us a mind not to be "fruitful" with it? Is the mind evil or something? I was encouraged to pray in tongues - this would be "in the spirit" and answered by God - but how would I know?
Prophecy
It seems fairly clear to me that an aspiring prophet should begin by antagonising and losing all his friends. The Old Testament prophets were hated by all and sundry, so why should things be any different today? Prophecy isn't (so we learn) much about "foretelling" the future, but of "forthtelling" the purposes of God. Actually the only time I heard an explicit prophecy of what was due to happen in the future, the speaker said that everyone in the room's lives would be shaken to the core. Indeed they were - everyone there had their lives drastically torn apart, starting with him (and followed closely by me!). I mention this incident here. So don't expect to receive too much help with questions about how something important to you is going to work out. Indeed don't expect too much help and assistance with the problem bugging you most, or even tenth most. Don't even expect a message "you're doing just fine, carry on" The trouble is that people don't feel able to argue with someone who prefixes his opinion with "Thus says the Lord". Which is connected with my next point.
And God said to me...
One of the sillier things I was ever fooled by was where a preacher confidently asserts "God said to me..." in the middle of some anecdote he is using to illustrate some topic. Did God say that? Is he really saying that God is having a two-way conversation with him as he is driving his car, or shaving or something? I have sat down in silence and tried to pray, and to hear the voice of God and heard nothing. I have persisted, getting up in the early hours, fasted for 3 days at a time several times only drinking water, and yet the best I can offer is a few thoughts which I might have had myself. Yet these people are such spiritual giants that God reveals whole tomes of theology to them whilst they are waiting for the lights to change, or huge realms of spiritual insight whilst they are adjusting the position of their bathroom mirror. In the last prayer meeting I ever went to, at a church where Mr A had had an affair with Mrs B which had come out, the leader led prayers in turn for Mr A, Mrs A, Mr B and Mrs B. However Mrs B had bravely turned out to the meeting, in fact she was sitting close to me, and as the prayers worked towards her, the discomfort was obvious. Finally there was an argument between the prayer leader and Mrs B who asked if she could be omitted. However the prayer leader wasn't having that. She maintained that "God is insisting on this" and proceeded anyway whilst Mrs B sobbed. "If that is the voice of God", I thought, "I don't want to hear it at all.".
Healing
Now here, you'd think, is where God could really deliver the goods. An instant healing here, a cure of AIDS or terminal Cancer and people would sit up and take notice. Even more unarguably, let's see an amputated leg or just a finger get restored. You could actually see "before" and "after" pictures! Yet you don't. The cases I've heard are all second or third hand. Also speakers have a selective memory. One woman I knew at the church I was at up to 1986 had complications after sustaining a broken leg, requiring surgery. Yet in the interval since I knew her the broken leg has grown to her whole body being crushed. The complications have become a life-threatening coma. The surgery has become a prayer for healing answered instantly. And this is a major testimony which people are to be converted by. Why this exaggeration? If God can create a whole universe, a finger or a leg shouldn't be too much trouble should it? If healings do happen, why so few? How many of the stories I've heard have been huge exaggerations, passed on and added to in the telling? I have a nasty scar on my left thumb, just by the corner of the nail next to the index finger which I've had for many years. I did it trying to chop some inadequately defrosted food. I've been to the doctor and been told that there's not much to be done and I should be grateful I've still got the thumb, which is true. Still the scar is continually uncomfortable and in the past I've asked prayer for healing, but it never has been.
Conclusions
I have skimmed a little over my concerns about this subject. As with all my other thoughts, I'd welcome feedback and comments and I will attempt to enhance and expand them.